I remember writing about pegging about 20 years ago and everyone’s reaction was ‘What! My boyfriend/husband’s not gay, why the hell would he want me to do that to him?’
Pegging was the hottest sex trend this year and far from being a fad, is fast becoming something most couples try at least once.
For those not in the know, pegging is when a woman penetrates her male partner with a strap-on dildo.
There are ancient drawings of pegging, so it’s nothing new, and it’s been a popular theme in porn for decades.
It moved into the mainstream when US sex commentator Dan Savage, author of the Savage Love column, held a contest to come up with a name for the practise.
Pegging is now commonplace – there’s a brilliant scene in the cult TV show Broad City and it dominates the headlines in online sex blogs.
It’s a dynamic-flipping sex act which both sexes love.
Women want to try it, to experience what it’s like to be him, and most men love being pegged. His prostate is his G-spot, after all, and stimulating it leads to explosive orgasms.
As with anything anal, this isn’t something you surprise your partner with: everyone needs to give it the thumbs up before you go there. Prepare for pegging through anal play to get the anus used to penetration.
If you’re a beginner, I’d opt for a pegging kit that includes both dildos and a harness. You’ll find one in my supersex range but you’ll also find loads of others available, too.
You can hold the dildo in your hand but a harness makes it so much easier and means your hands are free to stimulate other bits.
HOW TO PEG YOUR MAN WITH A STRAP-ON
Wait until he’s fully aroused. As you usually would, start by kissing, using your hand and mouth on his penis and other hots spots – any and all the foreplay that makes him relaxed and turned on. Insert a finger or butt plug to relax the sphincter muscles so penetration isn’t painful.
Choose your dildo. Attach the dildo to the harness (follow the instructions for your particular type). Stay small for starters, especially if it’s a first time.
Loosen the harness so you can step into it and put your legs through the loops and main harness around your hips. Tighten. (Most harnesses work on this system, but again, follow the instructions if yours differs.)
It’s a very good idea to practice wearing a harness and strap on before trying it out with your partner, just to get used to wearing it and seeing yourself suddenly sporting a penis!
Add the bullet vibe, if there is one, into the pouch on the harness or inside the dildo (depending on what model you have) to add extra stimulation for the wearer and receiver.
Put a condom on the dildo. It’s a lot easier to clean afterward and makes it nice and smooth to insert. You might like to put down an old towel for the same reason.
Use lots of good-quality anal lube that’s designed for pegging or anal play. You’ll need lots of it. Stop to add more if it starts to feel dry or uncomfortable.
Get into position. Some say doggy style works well as a starter position because the wearer has more control but others find it difficult to pull off. Plus, you can’t see his face to read his expressions to find out whether it’s hurting or hellishly good.
Experiment. Try lying behind him and penetrating from a spoon position. Add pillows under his hips to make it easier. Also try him lying back, knees pulled up to his chest.
Hold onto the base of the dildo for more control and stay penetrated rather than pull right out while thrusting.
Press the head of the dildo against the opening and wait for the anus to relax and open, then penetrate slowly and a little at a time, waiting for the muscles to relax around the dildo at each stage.
The receiver is in charge. A penis has nerve endings, a dildo doesn’t – so the wearer has no idea how deep they are really going. Talk constantly about how they’re feeling.
Don’t thrust fast. Keep it slow and avoid the temptation to ‘pound’, especially as you’re both getting used to it.
Aim towards his belly button to make sure you’re massaging the prostate.
Exit as slowly as you entered – go too fast and the muscles will tense and spasm.
Never insert a toy that’s been in the anus into the vagina without cleaning it first. The bacteria from the anus can create havoc in the vagina. Don’t go there.
For girl-on-girl vaginal penetration, follow the same instructions as above and make sure she is fully aroused and lubricated before penetrating.
